Heart.Teaching.

The 5th grade generation went on a team building field trip today at a ranch about 40 minutes outside of Monterrey. The goal of the day was to have kids go through different challenging activities together to create a better classroom environment. The school hired a company to come in and lead the different groups through different obstacle courses, ropes courses, etc.

One of the groups in my class was doing an activity where they had to cross over a high rope without touching it. Their strategy was building a pyramid and having one person at a time cross over the rope and then jump down from the top of it.

It was Vale's turn.

She got up to the top and in quick second, fell from the top of the rope. straight on her head.

She didn't cry. She couldn't. Her eyes rolled back into her head and in less than twenty seconds, she began to have a seizure. I stood over her and felt helpless.

For what seemed like an eternity, my little V, wouldn't stop seizing. I started to run towards the ambulance at the ranch and was screaming for help. While I was screaming, I could feel myself start to cry. But I knew, that if I wanted my class to keep it together, I had to too.

When I got back to the rope, V was sitting up. I sat there and held her hand and rubbed her back. Trying to explain in Spanish that she had a seizure, I could feel the tears coming again. I honestly felt like my own child was sitting there.

In the midst of V's seizure, one of my precious gems, was so terrified from what he saw, that he too fainted on the ground. Hitting his head on the pavement, I now had two injured students.

The ambulance came and I road with the two of them to the hospital. Their families met us there. I still felt the tears coming, but trying to be strong, I kept them back. I sat in their rooms, told them jokes, asked them about their big weekend plans, and gave them my lunch.

They did a brain scan and V was miraculously just fine. She didn't have any internal bleeding. We signed the papers and walked out of the emergency room.

V's mom dropped me back off at the school. I kept holding it together.

And finally, when the day was done, I walked home. I opened my bedroom door, sat on my bed, and cried. hard. I didn't have to be strong anymore. I can't explain my job sometimes. It's not just teaching. I love my kids. I'm sad that it takes a close call accident like this to make me realize just how much I care about them.

For awhile now, I haven't been able to find my heart in teaching. I've been going through the motions and have forgotten the reasons why I have chosen this as a career.

Today, in the midst of a chaotic situation, I found my heart again in teaching.