Not Just a Job

When people tell me that teaching is just my job, I laugh. When you're in the business of people, its never just a job. You dig in. You invest. You become attached. I think about my students a lot, more than I'd like to admit. Its not just about assessments or marking. It's not about meeting the benchmarks or fitting in the units. It's about relationships.

My heart has felt particularly heavy over one of my boys recently. C comes from a really messed up home. His mom and dad had an incredibly messy divorce last year where the mom moved out. C doesn't really see his mom anymore. His dad is a head honcho for some big wig company and is never around. To be nice, he's not exactly the easiest man to communicate with. C lives at home with the "staff members" at his house, where one of his several maids takes care of him. I feel for him more than I can write down here. When C makes less than desirable choices, forgets his homework, or never really accepts responsibility for his actions, I feel frustrated. It's more than just his choices. I feel frustrated watching a boy, who shouldn't have the cards life has thrown at him, slide downhill.

In this community, people paint over bad situations with money. They cover over the brokenness of their homes by driving nice cars and wearing business suits. But when you dig deep, you realize that we're all the same. C just wants to be cared for. I see through his strong facade.

The other day C cheated on an assignment, gave a lousy excuse for his missing homework, and lied to me. I took his hand and told him I cared for him more than he knew. He started crying and said "I know." Later on that day at lunch, he was still with his "tough guy friends" at the "cool" table. He didn't say anything when I passed by but I knew my words had hit him.

Teaching isn't just a job.